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Da Voodoo Doctor is In (Advice 5c)

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Hard Like Heroic
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I took some time off work and played WoW like it was my job. On Friday evening Dysmorphia go to the new level cap. A big shout-out and thank you goes to my imaginary friend Demonical who grouped with me from 83 to 85 and substantially increased my leveling speed as well as fun.

Late Friday night, or early Saturday morning, depending on how you reckon time, I ran my first heroic. My gear was just good enough to queue for a random. By luck, I had chosen to quest through zones that gave me good reputation gear, and by design I had healed every single new five man while leveling so I had a good quantity of reputation blues, dungeon blues, and dungeon quest blues.

The first heroic I healed was Black Rock Caverns. That molten armor boss can completely go fuck himself with a diseased porcupine. It took about two hours for my group to figure out and correctly execute the strategy. It went well beyond pleasantly challenging and into frustrating. Everyone was taking huge ticks of unavoidable damage, the tank was getting owned, ads were fucking me up, and I was quickly running out of mana just trying to keep everyone alive. Not topped off--just barely alive. Before I even had a chance to to get the party to 30% the tank ran in for more stacks of party wide damage. FML.

I can’t say that I felt satisfied when we killed him. I didn’t even feel relieved. I think I’m suffering from healer PTSD. When I see people offering 100g in trade for a tank AND a healer for heroics, I want to laugh in their face. Laugh In Their Face. That wouldn’t even cover my repair bill, never mind compensate me for my pain and suffering.

The negotiations for my services as a PUG healer in heroics start at 1,000g. Not that I’m selling them, because I’d rather spend a couple of hours doing Archeology waiting for a good guild group.

Luckily, other heroics have not been as painful and insane. I am, in most ways, enjoying the challenge. But I am not enjoying people trying to do weird, special achievements when I haven’t even done a dungeon on heroic before. It is difficult for me to convey to my group mates, it seems, that just doing the dungeon is quite sufficiently challenging without attempting arbitrary feats on top of it. I also find myself feeling pretty angry at people who stand around waiting for a heal between trash groups as I drink. I’ve stopped healing them. They can die. Slowly, the little ducklings are learning.

I’ve adapted fairly well to the notion that my group mates can sit at low health for long periods of time. I’m trying to adapt to the notion that tanks can’t control all ads and I’m often getting beat on or killed. Since my main heal right now is Nourish, it does rather wreak havoc on my healing to get the constant pushback. Hunters are now my favorite group mates.

Healing makes me feel bad-ass again, and I like that. Healing no longer relies on who can mash Rejuv the fastest or react in a split second to a hit that will two-shot the tank. Triage is back. Smart decisions about healing matter and you have time to make those decisions. I feel more like I’m playing real time strategy than hair-trigger FPS with my healing and I really like that.

However, at current gear and experience levels, the mental focus I need to bring to heroics is more than I’ve needed to bring to raids for the last six months. So I can’t do too many because I run out of focus. I can sustain 3 hours of raid-level tension. Then I either get cranky or start making a lot of mistakes, or both.

I am scared to start raiding. If raiding is the incremental step up from heroics that heroics are from regular 85 instances, I am not sure if I’ll be able to handle it.


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